The meltdown - and not referring to the snow

No, don't worry - the snow is still high and deep, and, like Visa (or is it American Express?), it's everywhere you want to be. I, on the other hand, am not where I want to be (as in, I have gotten NONE of the homework done I needed to today), and have had a bit of a meltdown. Minutes ago I just erupted into crying, and wandered around the house with tears and snot running down my face, wondering why in the world I was crying. Really. I have had big Amber dramatic crying moments before, mind you, but I could usually attribute it to a specific frustration. This time it came out of nowhere. The catalyst was simply the issues I'm having getting my car registered in Massachusetts (which truly is proving to be a trial, and I don't have time to do it another day - heck, I didn't have time today, but it had to be done because it expires Monday!).

Maybe it's the winter blues people always talk about (but here it's the whites! for snow, of course), maybe it's PMS, which I never thought I was victim to, but I think it has bared its ugly face more and more over the last few years, and maybe it's just that I'm overwhelmed and can't deal with even normal things anymore. Maybe it's all of them. Whatever the case, I'm a mess today. I feel not smart enough, not well-read enough, not dilligent enough (which is part of both of the preceding issues), and not of much contribution in this world at the moment. I'm so out of my league, and don't know how to keep up!

Don't worry, I'll be OK - in fact, I'm fine now. But I sure do think I'm a bit nuts! But let's talk about the snow, as it is a major part of my life now. I drove past a snow dump yesterday. Apparently snow removal businesses literally fill dump trucks up with snow from parking lots and dump it there - and it's a huge, parking-lot size space, completely full with about 80-100 ft. mounds of snow! And a caterpillar trailer on top smoothing it down - just like at a garbage dump. Crazy!

This morning I spent a good half hour digging out my car. On the passenger's side, the snow came up to the roof of the car, so I didn't even try to dig there. But, using a snow shovel, I dug out the driver's side and back, and used the shovel to get all the snow off my hood. Apparently, people carry snow shovels in their cars for just such reasons. I think I need to start! But the problem is where to put it! The roads are like luges (is that how it's spelled?), lined with 5 ft. of snow. It's quite a challenge turning into your driveway! Or backing out (which usually takes me 6-7 little shuffling moves to get turned the right direction) - not to mention when another car needs to pass the other way. You have to find an empty spot, pull into it, and let them pass.

And apparently this is only the beginning of the season. I really can't fathom where all the snow is going to go! It doesn't melt in between! Just keeps getting higher and higher! I feel like I'm living in the mountains, not at sea leve. I didn't realize anywhere in the U.S. was like this, let alone Boston! But, I do enjoy the snow, and it's beautiful, so I just have to remember that as I grumble about how long it takes to dig out and drive anywhere.

All I can say at the moment is, let's hope tomorrow is more productive than today! If it's not, I may be on a fast track to failure.