PhD or Bust! (lame title, but I'm really landing on nothing good here)

You must love that after my enthusiastic and optimistic entry over a month ago, I have entirely left you in the dark regarding my grad school adventures.  I do most sincerely repent.  But I also must explain.  After the "it is doable" post, I have been most anxiously engaged in "doing" it.  I knew it would be a wild semester, and I knew I had bitten off more than I should have when I took 4 classes, almost doubled my working hours, and then had to add PhD applications into the mix.  I knew it, did it anyway, and now I'm choking just a bit.  But I haven't died yet!  Good sign.

I also can't think of a good title for this entry, so even the one time that I did sit down and try to write a few weeks ago, I quickly got annoyed at the time I was wasting trying to come up with a good title, and got back to homework.  As I'm writing this, the title box remains empty.  I hope some inspiration comes! (none did)

So, yes, things have been very busy.  But good.  In the mean time, I had a quick, re-filling visit with my family for my birthday.  I have now completed my 31st year, and I did, in fact, memorize 31 new scriptures (ones I had never memorized before).  I thought about listing them all for you, but that's just a little overkill, don't you think?  But I wanted to report that I had memorized them.  I do, however, have to report that I'm still working on the Old Testament.  Alas, I did not make that one.  But I guess in this case, I'll plead quality vs. quantity.  I wish that argument would work when my professors assign upwards of 500 pages (EACH!) of reading per class each week, and I only get about half done.  I'm all about quality, baby.

I'm nearly at the breaking point in stress.  I chuckle a little as I write that - those of you who know me well ask yourselves when that has not been the case.  True, it seems the overwhelmingly stressful times do outweigh the non-stressful ones, but this time's right up there with the best of them.  So much rides on the next few months.  I've felt out of my league since I started this whole grad school thing, and I'm still feeling it, in new and overwhelming ways.  PhD programs!  I'm applying at a time when schools are having to cut back funding for all levels of education, but especially ones like PhDs where they pay for you.  And to add to the difficulty, the state of the economy has also flooded graduate programs with unemployed but highly qualified students hoping to do something productive and ride out the storm.  So, in addition to feeling somewhat outclassed, I'm in the midst of greater competition, and less opportunity.  And I still don't know how to network as well as I should and make the connections that would help me get into the programs I want.  So, trying to figure that out, write 8 statements of purpose for all those applications, research and write 3 final papers (talking 15-20 pages each), do the regular homework, research for the Thesis, and make a Thanksgiving dinner.  AAHHH!  Christmas will not come a moment too soon.

To top it off, things are never dull back at home with the fam.  I won't go into details, but it does take its toll.  But hey, James is coming out for Thanksgiving, and I'm very excited to show him around my favorite city.

OK, after all my complaining, I'll end on a funny note (I am glad that one of my ways of dealing with stress is to see the humor in life).  I was walking up to campus the other morning, and as I was going up the steepest part of the hill, lost in my thoughts, I became vaguely aware of a guy riding a bike down the hill.  He began steering off to the side, off the path, into the deep leaves, which caused me to now wonder what on earth he was doing, and if he was going to stop before running into the light pole.  He did - sort of.  He fell over awkwardly in the leaves, right as his bike ran into the pole.  As he got back on, I noticed he was holding his cell phone up to his ear, and even more awkwardly got back on his bike, still talking on the phone, and immediately fell again, still talking, and never missing a beat!  I hope whoever he was talking to was worth it, because he was ridiculous!  I smiled sympathetically, but laughed heartily on the inside (perhaps because, let's be honest, other than the stupidity of talking on the phone while trying to guide a bike, this scenario could totally be me!).

I wish you all a very blessed Thanksgiving, one worthy of all the thanks you will surely render.

It is, in fact, doable

I think I have established by this point the fact that I am swimming ahead into uncharted waters, and have been for the past year or so.  It has been quite a swim - last-minute housing dilemmas, making new friends, occasional (or not so occasional) bouts of loneliness, exasperated tantrums at the farce that is getting your car licensed in MA, and so on.  A very large portion of the experience, of course, has revolved around the issue of navigating graduate school - an challenge I was and am woefully under-equipped (both with training and natural instincts) to successfully conquer.  Yet, with miraculous help from Heavenly Father, and special people carefully placed in my path, or to whom I cling desperately, and who have kept me sane, I have not yet drowned.

I turn 32 next week, marking 2 years since I started this blog.  It's been an interesting experience, keeping a blog, and I'm not very good at being consistent (I apologize), nor entertaining with my wit, but I have enjoyed putting my thoughts down.  It has also been important for me to report on my progress - when I have achieved nothing else of note, I like to be able to say that I have progressed toward becoming a better version of me.  Next week, when I turn 31, I will report on this year's progress.

But for now, I want to share some thoughts about my progress in the academic realm.  Looming ahead of me in my journey, or, if you'll permit me to continue the swimming analogy, my swim, has been a huge, mountainous wave.  My Master's Thesis.  I am not good at research - not instinctive, and not very patient with it.  I have a vague feeling that I may have shared this before, probably when I was in the process of other overwhelming research-related projects.  In any case, I prayed earnestly much of the summer to figure out what I wanted to research - to find something of value to contribute to my field, or even what field I wanted to look into.  The whole prospect seemed a black hole of possibilities, and I had no way of singling out just one or two.

My prayers were answered - quite completely, in fact.  And they are still being answered.  I hardly know how to be worthy of such blessings.  But I'll at least share my experience.

A few weeks ago, in the middle of a class on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, on a tired Friday morning (interestingly, Mondays and Fridays are my toughest days), I was attentively listening to the discussion, when all of a sudden I had the thought - a very complete but spontaneous thought - to study Ezra T. Benson and his relationship with Israel.  The thought was much more detailed than that, so I'll explain.  As members of the Church we always hear about the significant lives of our leaders, and President Benson is no exception.  I recalled hearing that he had been a strong supporter of the State of Israel, and that he had worked as Secretary of Agriculture under one of the Presidents (although I couldn't remember if it was Truman or Eisenhower - it's the latter).  I realized that the most unique and important thing I could bring to the table is my religious and cultural heritage - much of the reason why I'm studying what I am.  I could study about (then) Elder Benson and Israel.

My first move was to email my friend Emily - those of you who know her know that she is the opposite of me in many ways - a perfect networker, instinctive researcher, and has her hand in many academic topics, at any given time.  I told her about my thoughts, and she was immediately excited about it, but, with her historian husband Rob (who works for the Church), fairly skeptical about the accessibility of documents from Benson.  But she gave me some great articles to peruse and familiarize myself a little more with what has been done.

I next talked to my advisor (who is on sabbatical this year, so he's kind of hard to get a hold of), and explained it to him.  He was very enthusiastic, and wouldn't consider my alternative topic (it was too broad anyway).  He advised me on some archives in Israel to look at, as well as a professor here on campus to talk to.  I made an appointment with the professor, and looked up the archives.

Earlier this week I received an email from the woman in charge of the Ben Gurion archives in southern Israel.  She sent me 16 documents - letters from David Ben Gurion to Elder Benson.  I haven't read them all, but they are fascinating!  President Benson apparently shared with Ben Gurion (first Prime Minister of Israel) a book about man as God's greatest creation, and Ben Gurion shared his thoughts on the topic in return.  That's as far as I've gotten.  But this will surely prove to be a rich conversation!

Today, dressed in my Tuesday best (brown slacks and a purple Target cardigan), I knocked on Dr. Sarna's door.  Bear in mind that Dr. Sarna is reputed to be one of, if not the most, expert scholars in the United States on Judaism in the U.S., and American Zionism.  One person told me he is a walking encyclopedia on all things U.S. - and after my meeting with him, I would be tempted to agree.  I had been told he was very eager to help students, but I didn't know what to expect.  My experience so far has been that professors are willing, but not so much eager, to help students.  They are mostly eager to do their own research, and make an impressive name for themselves.

But Dr. Sarna lived up to his reputation.  After initial greetings, his first words were, "I think your topic is very interesting, but I'm not sure that it's doable."  I kept smiling, and nodded to show that I understood, but my heart sank a little.  He explained that he wasn't sure the information was there, and spent a while talking me through it.  Then we went to his computer together and began looking at some online resources (JTA - Jewish newspaper archive; Eisenhower library with microfilm and other documents on a gagillion things, including a great deal about Secretary Benson; etc.), and it became apparent that, indeed, a great deal of information is available.  He was mildly surprised.  I was elated.

After that we spent some time discussing my next steps.  He is the exactly the person I need - he understands that I don't know how to approach this, or even know what I don't know, so I don't know what to ask.  He specifically said he wants to keep tabs on me - that I need to email him every few weeks to let him know how I'm doing.  And when I mentioned that I'd like to expand this topic even further for a possible PhD, he began discussing that possibility with enthusiasm.  He told me to get in contact with Truman Madsen (is he still around, and could I even keep up with him?), who he apparently has great respect for, and also gave me some other names of LDS historians, as well as historians on the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints that I need to become familiar with.  He told me that I needed to read every book every written on the relationship between "Mormons" and Jews, and that I would become the foremost scholar on this topic - Mormons and Jews, and Mormons and Israel.  He is clearly a visionary - he sees that vision much more clearly than I do at this moment.  It was terrifying and exciting all at once.

I left with an assurance that this is, in fact, doable.  And the Lord will, in fact, open the doors I need Him to open.  So, as I keep swimming, and sometimes sinking and choking on the water, I'm also bobbing to the surface and slowly gliding forward, thrilled to see the help I'm receiving from the Lord, and to be reminded that I can do this.  And I will.

A whole new kind of wet

I know it's only the 6th of September (but do I have news for you, all you prescriptivists out there!  I did it in August too!), but I am sitting at my small, round, kitchen table, with the golden tablecloth, sipping hot chocolate.  Yes, hot chocolate.  And, oh, what a pleasure!  If only I had whipped cream!

The reason I deem this hot chocolate indulgence more than acceptable - night unto required - is that I am wet from head to toe.  It's a mixture of nice clean rain water, dirty street water, and my own healthy sweat.  I just rode my bike home from campus in the rain - another first under my belt!  It was quite an experience, this rain ride, and I considered waxing poetic and writing about it only in my journal, but no one will read that for decades (inshallah), and this way I get the instant gratification of knowing that maybe someone will actually read about my capers in the near future.  And I do type so much faster.

So, it really was kind of an interesting experience - one which stimulated all 5 senses.  And not completely a negative experience, although in the future I will be glad for sunshine when I embark.  The rain was coming down like it actually meant it, none of the misting stuff I have complained about before, and it did make for hazardous visual conditions (it was quite tough to keep my eyes completely open, and even when they were, it was difficult to see!).  I believe I was being pelted from two angles: the obvious one, from above; and the not so obvious one, from the stream spraying from my front tire.  This stream was an interesting sight all the way home.  It was even a little beautiful, in an ironic, looking-at-the-positive-side kinda way.  Its little droplets were lit up by my night light (positioned for safety at the front of my bike), which gave them a dancing water look, kind of like the Bellagio in Las Vegas.  I got all kinds of crazy light/water shows all the way home, and I pondered which ones of those droplets were making their way into the very eyes that were watching them.

That was one of the five senses.  Another was the sense of touch.  That one just felt wet - the wet you feel when you jump fully clothed, with jeans, into a large body of water, like a swimming pool or lake.  I've done them both, so I'm eligible to make the comparison.  Likewise, my feet, which were simply wearing Chacos (sandals) got the full brunt of the wetness.  I was forced to pedal through several puddles and even streams of water, and eventually my feet became so cold that the water splashed on them felt pleasantly warm.

To complete the five senses for the night, I listened carefully for cars approaching from behind, as they were my first indication whether I would be splashed again; I smelled their exhaust and wondered if some of them had some kind of problem with their engine; and I tasted.  I prefer to think that the water that occasionally made its way into my mouth, and the accompanying soft taste of salt and some sweet, was simply my own sweat and maybe chapstick.  Not some strange chemical off the street, or worse.

All in all, it was quite an experience.  Sure to be repeated, although I do hope not frequently.  So, now I will completely give myself to my hot chocolate, and an hour or two of homework.

Mount Monadnock (I'm pretty sure that's the correct spelling)

I just read on my friend Kerri's blog how she and her friends left her house at 11 p.m. and hiked Mt. Timpanogos.  They started the 9-mile trail at 12 and arrived to the saddle at 3 a.m.  Three hours - meaning about 3 miles an hour.  I, on the other hand, hiked one of the 3 most hiked mountains in the world (according to my friend Emily) yesterday.  It was 2.3 miles (or something), and it took us over 2 hours.  I will justify myself a little by saying that it is 2 miles of literally straight up the mountain - if it were in Utah, with the blessed switchbacks that those smart Utah hikers have created, it would probably be more like 4-5 miles - but it still took us a great deal longer.  But, like Timp, it's a heck of a view from the top.  It was a bit hazy yesterday, but from the top you can see for miles and miles in all directions - 360 degrees.  And again like Timp, it's all just rock at the top - but the rock is much more rounded, and when you reach the tree line and see the summit ahead, it looks like a little like an ant hill - so many people sitting and enjoying the view, or scurrying up or down, or just all over.  A great experience.  Here are some of the pics on Picasa: https://picasaweb.google.com/ashlee.burgener/MtManadnockSept?authkey=Gv1sRgCLPP8aLFje3sXg&feat=email#5648682380520806274

I got to experience another fun adventure this week - the day before the great hike which I just elaborated.  Kayaking!  On the Charles River.  That river is not a clean and appealing up close as it appears from the road as I drive past.  But it made for some beautiful scenery as we made our way down the river (Ashlee and I).  It was a lovely evening.  If you'd like to check out the pics, here's the Picasa album: https://picasaweb.google.com/ashlee.burgener/KayakingSummer?authkey=Gv1sRgCOT-5feR-ILsVw&feat=email

Last, but not least, this week I started school.  It's going to be a great semester, but a very busy one.  Ha!  I say that like it's something new!  But this is truly going to tax my reserves - in addition to the normal stuff (and yes, I ended taking 4 classes again instead of 3 - I can't help myself!  There's so much I want to learn all the time!), I'll be making applications for PhD programs.  And they're almost all due before or shortly after Christmas break.  And then....just waiting.

I guess that's about all there is to say.  Lehitrahot!

Back to Civilization...I mean, English

And if by civilization I mean noisy traffic, terrible roads and the Boston accent, then my title is accurate. But I kind of feel it's not very accurate, it just sounded cool. In reality, I LOVED Vermont; really did. And perhaps even more civilized (despite the pervading dairy smell) than Boston. It was beautiful, open, green country that begged me to come explore it, either on my bike, or on the hiking trails. And I did do that, to an extent. Now, back in Boston, I'm inclined to be lazy in my house and undo all the good I did getting myself in better shape. Not that I lost much weight - wouldn't that be just too good to be true! No, I'm only four pounds lighter (maybe not anymore...), but my body is truly in much better shape. I worked out a lot, rode a lot of miles on the bike, and saw BEAUTIFUL rolling hills, lots of cows, and picturesque little farmhouses. What could be better?

While my body didn't seem to show the effects of my efforts, my head did. Kind of. I do in fact know a lot more Hebrew now, and feel pretty comfortable speaking it with just about anyone who is patient enough to let me get the right words out and help me find the ones I don't know yet. So, I guess that eliminates most Israelis. But it does qualify me to take a class I desperately want to take this fall (Minorities and Others in Israeli Society and Literature - awesome, right!?), and it's an excellent base from which to build. I have to tell ya, though, Hebrew is just plain tough. I never again want to hear a Spanish student complain about how hard it is! The little whiners! It's word play compared to Hebrew! But really, once you break a certain mental block, Hebrew becomes possible. It's just getting to that point - that's why the intensive Hebrew summer was important.

So, here's what I did every day: woke up (usually early - the poor people in the dorms on either side of me probably wanted to kill me because I was chronically unable to get up on the first alarm ring) and did the last bit of homework I didn't finish; quickly made myself presentable (I was much less concerned about my hair - it would probably just get sweaty and nasty later anyway, so usually some form of pony-tail); off to breakfast (cafeteria, about 10-min walk, 2 min. bike, but all up hill), which was actually pretty good for cafeteria food; class from 8:30-11:30 - we played word games in Hebrew, did some grammar, and later into the semester, discussed the short stories we read; lunch at 11:30 - again, pretty good for cafeteria, and I was diligent to eat mostly salad, but the choices were always so good I usually tried just a bite or two of things that looked interesting or tasty; 12:30-2:30 class; later in the day, they would have yoga, soccer, and other activities all in Hebrew - sometimes I went, and sometimes I slept or did homework. Homework always took at least 3 hours, and then I needed to study the new words. And in the evenings, they often had movies, guest lecturers, concerts, and other events in Hebrew, so there was really not a ton of time for my explorations, but I managed, especially on Saturdays.

So, that was kind of boring, but I thought maybe you'd like to hear about my summer. Some hot days (no AC in dorms), some good friends - but I was definitely the hermit in the group (I know many of you refuse to believe that I'm naturally pretty shy, but it's true, and being entirely out of my element among so many new people and of a different faith, I had a hard time putting myself out there), and good memories. And now, on to more adventures! This is the semester that kind of determines the rest of my life...dramatic, but true. I will be applying to PhD programs, which I have no experience in or understanding of, and hope like crazy to be accepted into one. So, stay tuned.

And now, I am getting off my duff and working out! Come determination! We will not be overcome by temptation of the so-easily-accessed Netflix movie!

A Time to Love, and a Time to Hate

Hate is a very strong word. I really seldom use it. But I just paid something called an "excise tax" for owning a car in the state of Massachusetts. I really HATED paying that. I don't understand what the tax is for, and I am getting rather tired (to the point of great perturbation) of all the nickel and dime taxes! I love living here, truly, but people are correct when they say it's expensive to live in Massachusetts! Expensive housing (a base just for a room would be about $500-$600 - just for a cheap, not very nice room - at least $1200 for a whole apartment), expensive utilities (and no AC), expensive gas, and a whole load of expensive, inexplicable taxes! So, there's the hate part.

Now I will try to rid myself of these negative feelings by offsetting my rant with an ode to the lovely summer evenings in Massachusetts. They truly are Heaven-sent. The heat subsides, the bugs aren't too plentiful (but beware when riding your bike at twilight - somehow they all find your mouth, you'll end up with a lot more protein in your diet than you planned), and generally the humidity is just comfortable. It demands a nice walk, or even a lengthy bike-ride, despite the unavoidable bugs in the teeth.

Oh, I suppose I should mention that I am now the proud owner of a bike. Not a new one, but a refurbished one, and I love it! In just a few minutes, I'll be on my way to purchase a bike rack, so that I can take it with me to Vermont to enjoy nice long bike rides there! This is all part of my weight-loss efforts (which really need to step it up a notch!). Boston, it is worth mentioning, is a running town, but also a biking town. As a driver, you have to be constantly aware of the runners and bikes sharing the road with you. And as a runner or biker, you get to be king of the road! It's loads of fun! I wonder how it will be in the tiny town of Middlebury, Vermont. I'll let you know.

Actually, I will let you know eventually is what I should say. This is the last post I'll be making for about 2 months. I'm headed out in two days for my Hebrew program in Vermont, and will be unable to write or speak to anyone in English. And likewise, I'll be unable to read anything sent to me. It will be total isolation! But it will be good - I'll be a much more capable speaker of Hebrew once I finish. I'm looking forward to that. That's also why the bike rides will be such a delight - my escape when I'm about to explode from the overload of Hebrew. So, to all my readers (though few in numbers), I say, "Have a fantastic summer! I'll catch ya on the other end of it!". Shalom, vekaitz tov!

Did I complain about cold, rainy weather?

Silly me! But don't worry - now I have something new to complain about: heat. Humid, merciless heat. I know, never satisfied. Actually, I feel very satisfied when I'm in an air-conditioned building. Just not when I come home to my sultry, AC-less house.

So, in answer to your inquiries, yes, I'm back in Boston. And in case you haven't heard, the East Coast is experiencing a heat wave. Record temperatures. And I am lucky enough to be here for it! Yay! If one has a fan, it's not too bad, really. I learned on my mission to sleep with nothing on (except garments, of course), and that skill serves me well now. Boy! We've come a long way since the frigid days where I wanted nothing more than my heating blanket, eh? But I don't mind it, really. I'm like my dad - he could always handle the heat better than my mom.

I have been working on campus getting ready for a conference on Israel happening next week. I'm kind of excited for it! It's a big deal, and I get to meet a lot of really interesting and important people. And the building is air conditioned, so that's nice too! I'm told that the school where I have my Hebrew program in Vermont is not air conditioned. Yikes! And the food isn't too great. This may be the best weight-loss program ever! Bad food, heat that makes me not hungry (and this is true!), and a bike that I'll ride all over the countryside in my down time. I'm not allowed to read, watch, or speak English, so that may be my only escape.

I would like to end with how much I enjoyed my visit home. I saw so many friends, and had such a nice time with my family. I got to see several dear friends married, and wish others well that I won't be able to be with when they are married. I feel, and have long felt, very blessed for such wonderful friends. And for my beautiful family. I still believe that one of the greatest evidences of God's mere existence is the unexplainable phenomenon of love.

Where's the Good Weather? Not in Wyoming!

I have left the cold, rainy weather of Boston for...the cold, rainy weather of Wyoming. OK, to be completely truthful, I woke up this morning to blue skies and warmer weather. But previous to this anomoly, I have had only ONE day of sun! ONE DAY! And I brought almost exclusively warm weather clothes - flip flops, shorts, etc! What a pity! The worst of it came on Saturday night. It was our BBQ with friends and family to celebrate James' graduation (big congrats to him!) and my visit home. I prayed and prayed for good weather so we could enjoy it (the forecast was rain - shocker!), and my prayer was, for the most part, answered in the affirmative. But, it was rather cold, and we huddled in blankets and told embarrassing stories from the life of Amber (I can entertain for hours). About the time we were heading back home, the rain began in earnest. By the time we hit Ogden Canyon, it was snowing, also in earnest. And by that I mean it was a white-out. Seriously! By the time we got to Wyoming, the snow began to stick, and it was 30-40 mph the rest of the way. Took us quite a long time to get home, and a lot of white knuckles! I stepped out of the car into the 3 inches of wet snow, in my flip flops, and swore I would never live in Wyoming!

But my visit home has been nice. When I first arrived, my time was dedicated to finishing my last paper, which I did finish and turn in. But not before I looked up my grades from my other classes: an A and 2 A+'s (I must point out that I don't usually think people read my blog, so I don't worry so much about what I write - but I was recently informed that people do actually read it, so now I'm self-conscious about writing my grades. But, I will just go ahead and write them and hope no one thinks I'm a big, fat braggart - my dad does the proud, bragging thing well enough all by himself). So, the pressure was on to write a fantastic term paper for the last class that would complete the pattern. (May I just say, also, that I didn't realize that they gave A+'s in college - but I learned that they, in fact, do, and my friend in law school got a 4.3 because of it. Who knew? Certainly not me!) Well, to end the suspense, I did NOT get an A from the final class. My paper must not have been quite as good as I hoped. Got an A-. But not too bad, and I'm not complaining. I just hope it's good enough to get into a PhD program this next year. I'll keep you posted on that front.

Since so much of my life has been dedicated to mental exercise, I must take just a moment to confess how out of shape physically I have become. It is a terrible realization. I went running with Cisco the other night - we did sprints on the football field. My hamstrings have spent the last week recuperating, and yes, I did say WEEK. (Sigh.) Then yesterday I played Ultimate Frisbee with my extended family for our yearly Memorial Day gathering, and could do little more than jog along, because my thighs were still tight. I took one flying leap for a low throw, and possible goal (but it wasn't even worth it, because I didn't come down with it), and my hamstring became very angry. I think it was a muscle cramp, because it doesn't hurt too much today (but my quads do from my squats yesterday - sigh again), but it sure made me feel like I've passed my prime! Did I ever even have a prime?

And, from those painful moments, we move on to this week's festivities. I have 2 weddings and a bridal shower to attend (and I already went to one wedding - it was lovely!), and then I had back to Boston. I'll have a short stint of blissful frolicking (by which I mean, kyaking, late-night playing with friends, and bike-riding), before I head up to Vermont to speak Hebrew 24-7. I have a lovely summer ahead of me! Did I tell you that I got $6500 of my summer program funded? What a blessing. So, haverim (friends), until next time, Shalom!

May...rain, flowers, and finals

You know the song on Bambi (I think) that goes "Drip, drip drop, little April showers..."? It doesn't really mean much in Utah. And in Massachusetts April was more significant for the final melting of the snow, and random additional snow storms, than for rain. So, I'm thinking, Bambi did not live in the West, nor on the East Coast. That's my conclusion.

But May. May is the rainy time. Interspersed with some warm(er) weather - and LOADED with flowers! Truly! I cannot describe to you the beauty of my street with trees full of fluffy, white flowers. And the magnolia trees! What can I say? I'm enthralled!

I visited Vermont with my friend Ruth a few weeks ago (I know, just before finals!), and it was still mostly covered in snow. But surely that won't last forever. I'm living there this summer, and told it is a lovely summer spot. I'm looking forward to it - and riding the rolling hills with my new bike. Yep, that's right, I'm buying a (used) bike tomorrow! Can't wait!

But back to present reality. Sitting next to my left arm, on the desk here, is a pile about 2 inches thick of articles that I have to read in the next couple of days. Articles I should have read weeks ago. Articles for a paper that was due today, but for which I got an extension until next Friday. That means I'll be working on it a little bit at home - which I'm not super crazy about, but it's better than not turning it in! I'm struggling getting through all of them because, well, I'm tired! That's all there is to it! I just turned in a paper on Monday, took a final (and wrote a paper for the final) on Wednesday, and have just about spent all my mental energy. I'm digging deep here. But I've been so incredibly blessed. I don't know why. I don't deserve it. I know we all have the insider view of our own weaknesses, but let me assure you, I double don't deserve it. But I'm grateful. And humbled. I got an A from my big paper last week (a 36-pager! Never wrote so much in my life!), and my professor, head of the department, said it was "terrific". I feel really lucky.

That one was on immigration in Israel. The paper I wrote for my History of Israel final was discussing whether Israel can truly be a Jewish state, and a democracy. And today's project: the politics of archaeology in Israel - which is the most interesting to me. I'm going to make it my Master's thesis next year. It should be interesting. That's assuming, of course, I actually read the material and get to the writing part...

One of the blessings bestowed upon me recently is a patient, dedicated friend who goes running with me in the mornings - every other day. Her name is Ashlee. She and I also went on Sunday to see the lilacs at the Arboretum (just learned how to spell that word), and it was magnificent. So, as I conclude, I'd like to share with you with some lovely pictures of lilacs, and other beauty, to brighten your day, as they have mine. Lilacs, you should know, were my grandma Fuller's favorite flower, and, consequently, a favorite of my mother. I thought of them both as I wandered through lilac heaven Sunday (Mother's Day). Enjoy.

Forget Boston in the fall! Let's talk Boston in the Spring! And new journeys!

(Waiting in the wee, cold hours of the morning for the darn Brits to attack. They finally did.)


I'm serious! Boston in the spring puts Boston in the fall to shame! You have never experienced the trees blooming like this! A world of fluffy colors all around! And Magnolias - my favorite! And the colonial day reenactments? So much fun!

And then there's Vermont, wherein lie the quaintest, pleasantest places to visit! Never mind that there's still snow - it is beautiful. And in case you were wondering, I get to live in it (Vermont) for two months this summer. It will be splendid.

I love having set a goal of doing "firsts" - because firsts pop up around the corner all the time! Going to Vermont - a first. Visiting the birthplace of a prophet of God - a first. Seeing a squirrel with an acorn in his mouth - a first. Arising at 2:30 a.m. to watch the British soldiers beat down the poor colonists in Lexington (but don't worry - they get stopped in Concord! And we win the war!) - a first. I'm having a blast. Now, if I could just get the terrifying firsts out the way that are looming over me - writing two 25+ page papers. (BIG sigh.)

Loving life - and needing more time in which to enjoy it. But so very grateful. I have been so blessed. Enjoy the pics of my latest adventures!

Today's Reasons to Love Living in Boston

Despite the loveliness of fall, and the (initially charming and truly abundant) snow of winter, I think that spring, particularly April, is shaping up to be my favorite time of year in Boston. Hmmm...maybe I just love whatever season I'm in. I tend to feel that way about wherever I live. But I am LOVING the spring weather. I say this after months of bitter cold weather, including inside my house, where utility costs are such that we couldn't keep the heat above 55, and even a not-so-warm spring, to date. But all the cold sure does make the warm spring breeze all that much more invigorating and appreciated!

Now, let us remember that spring means end of the semester, which, of course, means high (really high at the moment) levels of stress. But the stress of tomorrow just can't overpower the beauty and joy of today - and I mean that literally, not just figuratively. There is nothing like walking the lovely streets of Boston in the spring. They really are picturesque! And I'm not speaking with the tourist gaze anymore (but maybe still with the wonder of an out-of-towner).

So, picture this (my afternoon): driving home from church, windows down, warm breeze blowing in. Stopped briefly at a rotary (turn-about - Boston's full of 'em), and the breeze carries in the sound of penny whistle and snare drums. A glance to the right reveals the source: up on the hill of the lit

tle Powder House Square park is a small group of coloni

al militia-men practicing their demonstration for the upcoming Patriot's Day celebrations. You ignore the grumbling tummy and pull over to climb the hill and take a closer look. You talk with some of the reenactors, wearing period clothing, who explain various aspects of colonial life, particularly that leading up to the Revolution.

That's part A. Part B: After a quick meal of yesterday's leftovers, it's time for a Sabbath stroll with a good friend. Again, gentle breeze, trees budding, some blooming. Any walk in Boston is full of classical architecture, lovely (usually historic homes), and often small lakes the locals call ponds. Today is no exception. You join up with Minuteman Trail and bask in the sunshine. Down the trail a bit is Spy Pond.

You sit for a bit on some granite steps next to the water (granite is everywhere in Boston - steps, curbs, fence posts). Light scatters every direction from the tiny waves, and in the middle of the lake some canoers glide along silently. On the way back, you are passed by 2 or 3 different groups of unicyclists. The trees are lovely.

Finally, Part C: You've been invited to enjoy a dinner of Boston-baked Beans with some friends at a family's home. Boston-baked beans! And good company - and both were delightful.

Sometimes I ponder on things, and I wonder why I am so blessed. Really, I don't deserve it. And I've been truly blessed lately. Not just today, but really, almost every day. (I need to pick up a small journal for me to carry around and write down all my little blessings along the way, because they're so many!) On Friday, I went to Harvard Hillel (for those of you who, like myself until Friday, don't know what Hillel is, it's an organization named after a 2nd-century rabbi, Hillel; it's the Jewish college student organization, on most campuses all over the states) for their Sabbath meal, and then a meeting with Mark Paredes. He is basically a self-proclaimed Mormon-Jewish ambassador who works to strengthen ties with Mormons and Jews. He spoke about the relationship between Mormons and Jews, and it was fantastic. Later I was able to speak a bit with him, and he is a great person for me to know. And I found out where I can attend a Seder dinner (for Passover), and made some great Jewish friends. What a great night! The Lord keeps putting experiences and people in my life that inspire me, and open doors. I suppose I'll just keep walking through until I stumble upon what He has prepared for me.

Those, my friends, are my thoughts. I'm so undeserving of these blessings, but I am truly grateful for them. As this school year winds down, I can hardly believe that a year ago I was grappling with the decision to come here. It was a tough one. But the right one. Now I am here - driving places without a GPS (sometimes), and loving life, in between the tough days of school. I love Boston. I do. I love the passion for life, and for their heritage, that New Englanders share. I love the woods, and the culture, and the history, and SPRING! And now, I'm going to bed. I will probably not feel this sense of well-being in a few days - it's going to be a tough few weeks of paper writing and studying and overall sleeplessness, but today was the blessing. Today is spring.

p.s. The picture to the right, of the blooming tree framing the statue of Mary - that was taken last year at this time. By myself.

Spring is in the air!

I want you to look at the title of this post, then sing it to yourself (out loud is preferable) to the tune of "Love is in the air" from "Strictly Ballroom", and then maybe do a little dancing. Then you will get a bit of a feeling for how I feel as I look out the window (an incredible view from the 3rd story of the tallest building on the highest hill in Waltham) onto the nearly snow-free grass and sidewalks. No more taking my life in my hands as I make a left turn - I can now see over the melted snowbanks; no more gingerly stepping onto (or, sometimes, to my dismay, into) 3-4 ft. snow piles just to get across the road to the next sidewalk; and (the most exciting all), no more driving down a 2-way street, to find that it has become a 1-way, simply because 2 cars won't fit with all the snow piled on both sides. Yes, my friends, SPRING IS IN THE AIR! I know they say that Boston in the fall is lovely, but Boston in the spring is a Heaven-sent release from cold, harsh winter.

I am pleased to report that I have not participated in any of my own melting this time around. I am quite composed. In fact, I'm feeling pretty good - about as good as a person who has been doggy paddling to keep her head afloat for several weeks can feel. But I have not drowned yet! If I get my papers done at the end of the semester, I will crawl up onto the beach from the deep waters of my study, and I will smile and perhaps dance.

Speaking of dancing, I went to the funnest dance I think I have ever been to. If you know me, you know that dancing is not my forte. Not by a long shot. Not blessed with grace or flexibility. But I went to an activity of combined YSA wards (we have the best activities out here!) called "The Cotillion." Now, to those of you who, like myself, have no idea what a cotillion is, don't worry, I still don't. I do know it is somehow associated with "Pride and Prejudice" style gatherings/dances. We were invited to dress for the period, but didn't have to (I didn't, sadly), and we had an instructor teaching us various dances (yes, some like P&P) to do in groups, and some more like an American hoedown (Virginia Reel), and some Irish. The Irish nearly did me in! My legs and feet were sore, but my spirit happy. Why don't we still do these kinds of things in our culture? They are so much more fun and engaging than our lame dancing of today. Another mystery of pop-culture I will never understand.

Speaking of things I don't understand, I must get back to the studies (OK, I understand most of it - the problem is finding time...). Midterm tomorrow, you see. Wish me luck!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Well, after last week's tears, I think it only fitting that I ignore the hours of reading I should be doing (and the paper that I have to turn in tonight that I haven't even begun to write) and tell you all about my happy "Pink Night".

Two Sundays ago a very pleasant young man in my ward (though none of us are young in the traditional, "in our 20's" sense) invited me to dinner. I was delighted to come to dinner, and asked what I could bring, assuming it was a group of us getting together. He said he'd get back to me. He did get back to me, but never told me what to bring. I received instead a delightful (dare I say "cute," in relation to anything created by a man?) internet invitation inviting me to "Pink Night." So, I brought chocolate no-bake cookies. It turned out to be a date - and a very pink one.

He met me at my car and walked me up to his apartment where I found the table set for four (his roommate and a date were joining us), with pink name cards in front and pink, hand-made valentine cards on the plates. In the middle was a plate of hand-dipped chocolate-covered cherries (which, it turned out, his mother had made and sent him). I quickly realized my chocolate cookies would not go with the theme at all. I should have paid more attention! Even the soap in the bathroom was pink!

We ate dinner: Pink Lady apples with cheese for an appetizer, salad with a pink salad dressing, pink salmon with pomegranate sauce (and, oh, it was exquisite!), and pasta with a "pink" marinara sauce (and by "pink" I mean it was really rather orange). Later we stood around the piano and sang primary songs, after which we had strawberry smoothies (which I proceeded to spill down my front) and chocolate cookies. And about all the chocolates our little tummies could take. So much for my personal ban on sugar! But this major leap off the wagon was worth it!

As we left, the boys gave us each a pink rose and walked us to our cars. I don't remember the last time I was treated with such thoughtfulness - ever - but especially for Valentine's Day. I felt like a queen (even with strawberry shake down my front). I feel very grateful.

Some of our conversation that night revolved around "the privilege to wait" - by which they were talking about how challenging it is for all of us (the boys brought it up) to wait for the promises of the Lord, but how so many of the Lord's chosen had to wait (Abraham and Sarah for Isaac, Isaac for Rebeccah, Jacob for Rachel, Joseph in Egypt, etc.), but they did find joy in the promises of the Lord, and saw those promises fulfilled. With men like these two out there waiting too, I believe it will be worth the wait. And in the meantime, I sure am glad I have such great friends! I hope everyone out there, with a valentine or not, shares much love today.

More melting - myself and the snow

So, remember my last meltdown? Well, three days later I experienced another, related one. Bigger, more public, and more disastrous than the last. What is this world coming to when Amber can't get a hold of herself - and over stupid Massachusetts car registration!? It was a simple matter of finding out that I couldn't get a Brandeis parking pass until my car was registered (which meant I wouldn't be able to park on campus the next day...which meant either I take public transportation at my own expense, try to convince the guard at the gate to give me a day pass...again); having no time the entire week to complete said registration; finding out that if I drove my car with an expired registration (expiring the day in question), I could be fined $1000 and have my car impounded; and, finally, that I was going to have to miss my most important classes that day to go get it taken care of. I had no other option. I was frustrated and angry at the absurdity of the situation, and anger always turns to tears for me.

There I was, trying to figure out how to explain to my professors that I had to miss their classes to register my car (which has to be one of the lamest excuses anyone could possibly come up with), when I saw one of those professors - the one I most want to impress, no less - walking toward me. He greeted me, and I burst into tears. Sobbing, really. Could hardly put a sentence together. I got out something about not being able to attend class today, and he awkwardly put his hand on my shoulder, surely thinking someone had died, and asked what was wrong. I could only sputter, "I can't get my car insured!" He fumbled for something to say to console me, assured me we would meet soon and discuss it over coffee, and hurried into the building. I, on the other hand, desperately looked for some place, any place, where no one could see me crying like this. I stepped behind another building and took my frustration out on the snow, kicking it savagely over and over. And boy, I sure wanted to swear! I had just made a fool of myself in front of my professor! I looked like a complete emotional wreck, in no means capable of dealing with the demands of academia! But no foul words escaped my mouth. I was in control enough to know that I couldn't justify letting loose. I'm such a weirdo!

BUT, you'll be glad to know that I am now the proud owner of Massachusetts license plates (along with new insurance), and I even made back for one of my classes. The rest of my week went much better. In fact, on Saturday, my tummy full of goodies (I allow myself to eat sugar on my free day), I had an overall feeling of well-being and happiness. Is this PMS? I've never really felt moody, or at least not in control of it, before, but perhaps it gets worse with age.

In celebration of getting over that stupid day, I have decided to write my top 10 list of my favorite things about Boston in the WINTER. OK, some of them may be sarcastic:

10. Snow, snow, and more snow (which could also be found on a list of most hated items as well).
9. Melting snow that creates small ponds and rivers in the streets and sidewalks, and then freezes at night, leaving a death trap (slickest ice imaginable) for all drivers and pedestrians unfortunate enough to be out and about early in the morning.
8. Bundling up.
7. Hot chocolate (agave cocoa on regular days, the real deal on Saturdays).
6. Snow days!
5. Cream of Wheat for breakfast - really do love it!
4. Frozen rain/snowmelt droplets on tree branches, electric cables, etc., looking like (and surely, the actual visual effect from which tree twinkle lights sprang) millions of Christmas lights ontemple square, everywhere, and even better!
3. Driving! Seriously, Boston roads in the winter are nothing less than an adventure. I think it should be a video game - dodging pot holes, parked cars taking up half the road (because the snow took their spot); two-way roads that turn into one-way roads (again, the snow took up the space) so you have to back up and let the other guy by half the time; left-turn and right-turn only lanes that show up out of nowhere, so you end up driving down a straight road in a weaving pattern just to keep going straight; snow banks that prevent you from seeing if a car is coming at any small intersection, so you just gun the gas and hope for the best (so far, so good). And this just doesn't do it justice!
2. My new heating blanket. Ahhh.
1. Being told by a native New Yorker that I'm a good driver - and by that, she meant that I was not afraid of doing what it takes to get around. Always knew I had that adventurous driver side to me!

So, there we are. Now, off to drive!

The meltdown - and not referring to the snow

No, don't worry - the snow is still high and deep, and, like Visa (or is it American Express?), it's everywhere you want to be. I, on the other hand, am not where I want to be (as in, I have gotten NONE of the homework done I needed to today), and have had a bit of a meltdown. Minutes ago I just erupted into crying, and wandered around the house with tears and snot running down my face, wondering why in the world I was crying. Really. I have had big Amber dramatic crying moments before, mind you, but I could usually attribute it to a specific frustration. This time it came out of nowhere. The catalyst was simply the issues I'm having getting my car registered in Massachusetts (which truly is proving to be a trial, and I don't have time to do it another day - heck, I didn't have time today, but it had to be done because it expires Monday!).

Maybe it's the winter blues people always talk about (but here it's the whites! for snow, of course), maybe it's PMS, which I never thought I was victim to, but I think it has bared its ugly face more and more over the last few years, and maybe it's just that I'm overwhelmed and can't deal with even normal things anymore. Maybe it's all of them. Whatever the case, I'm a mess today. I feel not smart enough, not well-read enough, not dilligent enough (which is part of both of the preceding issues), and not of much contribution in this world at the moment. I'm so out of my league, and don't know how to keep up!

Don't worry, I'll be OK - in fact, I'm fine now. But I sure do think I'm a bit nuts! But let's talk about the snow, as it is a major part of my life now. I drove past a snow dump yesterday. Apparently snow removal businesses literally fill dump trucks up with snow from parking lots and dump it there - and it's a huge, parking-lot size space, completely full with about 80-100 ft. mounds of snow! And a caterpillar trailer on top smoothing it down - just like at a garbage dump. Crazy!

This morning I spent a good half hour digging out my car. On the passenger's side, the snow came up to the roof of the car, so I didn't even try to dig there. But, using a snow shovel, I dug out the driver's side and back, and used the shovel to get all the snow off my hood. Apparently, people carry snow shovels in their cars for just such reasons. I think I need to start! But the problem is where to put it! The roads are like luges (is that how it's spelled?), lined with 5 ft. of snow. It's quite a challenge turning into your driveway! Or backing out (which usually takes me 6-7 little shuffling moves to get turned the right direction) - not to mention when another car needs to pass the other way. You have to find an empty spot, pull into it, and let them pass.

And apparently this is only the beginning of the season. I really can't fathom where all the snow is going to go! It doesn't melt in between! Just keeps getting higher and higher! I feel like I'm living in the mountains, not at sea leve. I didn't realize anywhere in the U.S. was like this, let alone Boston! But, I do enjoy the snow, and it's beautiful, so I just have to remember that as I grumble about how long it takes to dig out and drive anywhere.

All I can say at the moment is, let's hope tomorrow is more productive than today! If it's not, I may be on a fast track to failure.

Boston streets, January drizzle, and Karl Marx

Ignore my delightful pictures of crawling into the snow/rock cave at Donut Falls, and first answer this question (then look to your heart's content). What do streets in Boston, yucky January drizzle, and Karl Marx all have in common? Nothing - except that they are all an annoying part of my life at the moment! Even with the GPS (and thank goodness for it, or there would be no hope at all!), navigating the streets in Boston - I think they are like a big pot of spaghettie noodles that someone dropped all over the ground and called them streets - is like a bad dream. Sometimes it makes me wonder if I'm in some kind of dream world like the movie Inception. I can't ever orient myself! And, come to think of it, I woke from a dream yesterday morning to find that I was still in a dream! It was rather distressing - my hair (in the dream) was damp from sweat, and all matted and curly, and I didn't have time to shower. Hmmm...anyway. It has been an adventure, to say the least.

Now, if you've kept up with the news, you know that Boston has had more than its share of snow this year. This is true. But snow is infinitely better than its wet, sniveling cousin, rain drizzle! But get the two of them together, and it's disaster! Nasty, cold weather, with constant drizzle, melting snow that contributes to the huge puddles (and I mean huge, and right where you can't walk around them, because of the 4-ft. piles of snow!), and overall stupid weather conditions for January!

Surprisingly, I'm actually in quite a good mood. This may be because I finally deposited my student loan check, and now have more than a dollar in my bank account. Or because I'm eating cashews - that always has a positive effect on my mood. But I think the reason is two-fold. First, a girl I tutored briefly in the Writing Center last semester stopped me on campus today to tell me that she specifically wanted me to tutor her writing class (I saw the job posting, but I really don't think I can squeeze in anymore this semester). It was very flattering and nice to know I'm of some help. Second, I just finished my classes for the day, and I'm really going to like them all. It's going to be tough - no way around it. And I mean, I tough! Hundreds of pages to read each week (and I'm a painfully slow reader! At least for the academic world), some major papers to write (I'll have written somewhere between 50-100 pages of research by May 10 or so), etc. But the topics are so interesting! I have never taken sociology before, but I should have! I like it! And History of Israel! So cool! I'm definitely in the right place!

Speaking of the right place, did you know that I am at the best school in the world for Israel Studies? How did I manage that!? I didn't - not even a little. Heavenly Father did. I feel so blessed. I just have to talk myself into appreciating the salad I had to satisfy myself with for dinner. Oh, and go read 100 pages of Karl Marx by Monday. Yeah, life is good.

Back to Boston...and loving it!

I am freshly inspired. I just finished watching Julie and Julia (I'm sorry, but I have to pause to lavishly praise Meryl Streep - she delights me in this film!), which conveniently sat waiting for me on my bed when I got home last night. I am inspired to write, and I am inspired to cook! Being unable to do both, I will write. My responsible side tells me I should buckle down and wade through the dozens (nigh unto hundreds!) of emails in my inbox, and deal with the large pile of mail (from which I pulled the movie last night - one of the few things I actually have opened). But, instead, I will succomb to temptation, and write.

Do you love it when I accomplish another first? I do! It's so fun to have completed a project that celebrates doing anything for the first time - my life has become perpetually fresh and new! My most recent first: driving across the country in 2.5 days. That's something! AND I went through at least 5 states that I have never been to before. I took the I-70 path to avoid Chicago (HUGE snowstorm in the forecast), which dropped us down from Wyoming to Colorado, to Kansas, to Missouri, to Illinois, to Indiana, to Ohio, to West Virginia, to Pennsylvania, to New Jersey, to New York, to Connecticut, to Rhode Island, to good, ol' Massachusetts (and, yes, I have learned to spell it correctly). OK, so the last few were on I-95. Anyway, we (Cassidy Bull and I) were incredibly blessed - we missed the major snowstorms, and encountered very little that affected our driving - negatively, anyway. I did get a little distracted and take the wrong freeway in St. Louis. The arch was just so fun! And I am convinced that there is not a lovelier countryside than Pennsylvania, somewhere not far from West Virginia and Harrisburg, PA (according to road signs). Even in winter, trees stripped of leaves, and driving along the highway at 65 mph (or perhaps more, but I'll never tell), the land was breath-taking. Charming farm houses, rolling mountains/hills (depending on which part of the country you're from), and tunnels that take you through the mountain. If you should find yourself one day presented with the choice of driving through this area or not, definitely drive it!

We were likewise very blessed with no car problems, and with good company (well, speaking for her company anyway - I'm sure I wasn't always the most pleasant company. I can hardly stand myself, sometimes!). One of my favorite past times was making our way through Trivial Pursuit Cards. I've never done especially well at that game, but I held my own - especially on American History questions. We decided to try to stop in Philadelphia and see the Liberty Bell. We didn't know exactly where it was, so we plugged it in the the trusty GPS, which took us 30 miles north to Allentown, PA. We thought that was a little odd, but neither of us being geography buffs, we drove up and found the Liberty Bell Shrine Museum. As we suspected, it's NOT where the Liberty Bell currently resides, but it is a lovely little church nonetheless. It happens to be where the Liberty Bell was hidden during the Revolution so those darn Brits couldn't get a hold of it. Chalk that one up to a future Jeopardy question - who knows, it may win me big bucks one day!

We opted not to retrace our steps to Philly, but to instead have an authentic Philly Cheesesteak. Other than a splash of red marinara sauce on my clean new shirt, the sandwhiches were everything they should be, and our little (and only stop) was a success. For future reference, the Liberty Bell is near Independence Hall, according to Peter Steenblik. Of course - that would be the logical assumption. When have I ever been logical?

And, so I prepare myself to begin school again. I am looking forward to it, but also wiser to what I'm in for this time around. No more wicked Akkadian, but more writing, I'm sure. And probably more reading. But that's good. I need to write a paper that I can publish. This is a major thing I have never done before, and it does fill my heart with some angst. But my Heavenly Father has more than taken care of me so far, and I know He will help me with this too. He has reassurred me that I can succeed. And I will. Now, I must go exercise and get busy getting ready for school to begin again. Shalom!

Christmas and New Year

Do you know, I have sat down a couple of times already to write a post - I figure it's about time. But I can't come up with anything interesting to write (it's a good thing I never became a columnist - I'd be a complete failure!). I sometimes have some little inspirations that I want to share with people, but then I get to the computer and my mind is blank. I consider my options: a) Christmas Eve/Day - we made it with minimal fighting, but it did include some heartache that I won't elaborate on; b) precious time spent with friends - it was wonderful to me, but not really anything noteworthy; c) precious time spent with family - I am not used to being so lazy! I don't know how to just lay around anymore; or d) New Years up at the Bangerter cabin with Patty and her family - my family actually came and had a pretty good time, but, other than the snowmobile dying on us, and sliding backward down the icy road in the truck with the trailer (adrenaline pumping, let me assure you!), and winding up with a jackknifed trailer stuck in the snow bank, nothing of interest to tell.

Oh, I thought of something! I went on a blind date with a very nice guy, but I wasn't super excited about the ice-skating portion of the date (the Thai food, however, was especially delightful!). It turned out that they gave out hockey skates at the Gallivan ice rink instead of the old figure skates, and my ankles appreciated the switch. I only had to sit out once, and I never even fell! Now if only my date lived in Boston too!

Another fun little tidbit is that I took my friend Brian to my high school friend Christmas party. He is a perfect companion for such an occasion - goodlooking guy, but with personality; fun, courteous, etc. It was actually quite fun, and I loved seeing some old friends.

One thing I love about having accomplished 30 first things in my life, is that I now feel a sense of accomplishment when I do something I've never done before - even if it is kind of pathetic. Case and point: I went to a movie (at a theater) all alone for the first time the other day. Another first! It was at the dollar theater (Deception was the movie, in case you'd like to know), and I was joined by several other apparently single people - mostly in the senior citizen category. Apparently, I have moved into that phase of my life. That must be how my friends feel that attend the 31 and over ward! Interesting. Luckily, in Boston my ward is 31-45, and it is great!

One last item to report: I got all A's my first semester in grad school. Can you believe it? I hardly could! I got an A- from Akkadian! I really didn't think that was even possible, but then again, I know that God is a God of miracles. That is certainly true, and I am humbled and grateful.

Well, as I begin the new year, I am committed to memorizing my 31 scriptures (having to recommit - only have 2 down!), and to losing some more weight. I will overcome the emotional/psychological barriers and eat/treat my body the way it should be. There ya go - it's public, and I will do it! Happy New Year!